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ADVICE FOR MY DAUGHTER




  • You are supposed to make mistakes. That is what life is all about. There is no shame in making mistakes, only in not learning from them.

  • The girls who make fun of others are NOT cool. It is obvious they are insecure about themselves. Say a prayer for them and find new friends.

  • Be proud of your friend for making the varsity softball team. She loves it and has worked hard to get that spot. You shine in other ways. Celebrate her.

  • Your parents don’t hate you. They would literally run into a burning building to save you. They would do whatever it took to keep you safe from harm. They are not trying to ruin your life, in fact, even though you don’t get it yet, they are trying to save your life.

  • If the boy you have a crush on isn’t into you, it will be ok, I promise. In a few years, roles will reverse and he will have a crush on you and you will be interested in someone else. 

  • If a boy asks you out on a date and you aren’t interested in him: Thank him sincerely for asking you and tell him you like him as a friend and wouldn’t want to mess with that. Tell him you are super flattered.

  • If your boyfriend dumps you for another girl, do not be mad at that girl. The boy did you wrong, not her. Be kind to her and realize that soon enough she will be dumped too and feel just as crappy as you do now. Don’t date that boy ever again.

  • It is better to have many close friends than it is to have one best friend. Get in a fight with your best friend and it feels very lonely, get in a fight with one of your many friends, and you won’t be alone.

  • If a boy wants to go to the next “ base” and you aren’t ready, it doesn’t have to be a big drama. Just say, “Nah, not ready for that yet”. No need to apologize or feel awkward. If he is a nice guy, he will hear you and not press further. If he makes you feel bad, dump him immediately.

  • Don’t get a hickey. They are stupid and just evidence to your parents and the entire neighborhood that you were making out with someone. Not worth the punishment.

  • Don’t start shaving your legs until you have to. Once you start, you can’t stop and it will get annoying quickly.

  • When you get your period, learn to use a tampon asap. It is so much cleaner and easier.

  • If your friends start smoking, get out of there immediately. Even if you don’t smoke with them, your hair and clothes will reek and you will get in just as much trouble with your parents as if you did smoke. 

  • Don’t lie about getting a good grade on a test. Girls hiding their intelligence was so 1950’s….own your brains and don’t be shy about it. 

  • If someone messes with your younger siblings, get right up in their faces and with a quiet and low voice say, “If you go near my sister/brother again, I will end you.” And then walk off.

  • When you are taking gum out for yourself, offer it to those near you. 

  • If you think something nice about someone, tell them right away. There is no reason not to.

  • When you get upset with a friend, don’t text or call them right away. Go to bed that night and see how you feel in the morning. It usually seems less important then.

  • If you see someone being teased, step in and tell him that he is wanted “over there” by an adult. You will have stopped the bully and the kid can get away without a big scene.

  • If someone messes with your younger siblings, get right up in their faces, and with a quiet and low voice say, “If you go near my sister/brother again, I will end you.” And then walk off.

  • If you are upset about your weight, talk about it with your mother. She understands more than you know about this issue. She will help you to be healthy in a nonjudgmental way. 

  • You will know when you are ready to have sex: you are ready to have sex when you are ready to have a baby…you come from very fertile genes.

  • Life is never going to be easy. It is never going to be perfect. We are all just trying to do our best with every day we are given. Remember that, be compassionate to others and be kind to everyone. 



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