Mom’s Raising Special Needs Children are Allowed to be Fat

woman in brown classic trench coat eating mcdo fries during daytime

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I am going to spend the rest of my life getting a law passed by Congress that states: “if you have a child with special needs, you are allowed, ney, encouraged to be fat. You are also encouraged to grow out your gray hair and your upper lip mustache. Legs and armpits, too. Hairy and proud.”

That’s what we deserve. Give us a break, for God’s sake!!! You want us to be super hero parents AND you want us to look good? SHAME ON YOU. SHAME.ON.YOU.

Don’t we, as mothers of kids with special needs, deserve some sort of benefit? (yes, besides the benefit of raising beautiful, lovely children..blah blah blah). I think the benefit should be that we get to eat an obscene amount of oreos, in peace. We should be applauded for our extra weight. Think of all of the emotional eating we do because our kids stress us the f*** out!!!

So, let’s go, Ladies. We can do this. Let’s march the Capital and demand that we get this law passed. The fact that I am expected to be skinny, pretty, have zero cellulite, and wear heels, WHILEST, taking care of my kids’ with ADHD, Autism and Anxiety is just mean. MEAN.

If there was a law that we didn’t have to shave our legs anymore, I wouldn’t feel bad when I throw shorts on and realize too late that my legs could be mistaken for a monkey’s. Or, I wouldn’t feel bad when I am not wearing make up and bump into Bitsy and Mitsy in the grocery store. They would actually say to eachother , “Oh, God love her, she looks like shit…that’s how good of a mother she is!”

They would be at the next PTA meeting telling everyone that they bumped into Julie Falcone and she looked SO BAD that she must be acing it as a mom.

Don’t worry, ladies, after I write my book, law making will be next on my list. You are welcome ahead of time. Let’s start eating the oreos now, to get a head start!

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