I am so grateful that I am in my forties during this distance learning COVID-19 time. Why would I ever be glad to be in my fourth decade, with my gray hair, wrinkles, and cellulite as opposed to my late twenties and thirties, with my thick hair, tight skin, and toned-ass legs?
While my four children are working on their ipads doing their “distance learning”, I am in the living room working on my computer. They are yelling at each other and running around in circles, and I’m ignoring all of it. Here is what wisdom I have gained as I have aged: I will not lose my shit because the kids are still in their PJ’s, breakfast was leftover Easter candy, and every bedroom looks like a bomb went off. Nope. I am cool as a cucumber because I have learned, with age, that some crap just doesn’t matter.
After a phone call last night with my much younger mom friend, I hung up saddened about the pressure she feels to get everything accomplished. She was stressing about how she was going to find the time to sit with her kids as they did their school work while she needed to be on calls for her job. She was worried about what she was going to make for breakfast and lunch for her picky eaters. She was working on a schedule for the kids to make sure they got their thirty minutes of fitness, reading, creative, and study time in.
I tried to explain to her that she needed to cut herself some slack and be kind to herself. She wasn’t having it. The pressure of her being the perfect pinterest mom has not lessened during this unprecedented time. I feel sad for her and all of the other young mothers who are holding themselves to a higher standard than necessary.
So, give me the wrinkles, gray hair, sore joints and saggy neck. I will take those if it means I am not treating myself unkindly or giving myself the grace I deserve during these unchartered times. A “mature” friend of mine told me she is not worrying about her child getting all of his school work completed daily because trying to keep her adhd son focused on math, results in a screaming match that makes their lives miserable. She has decided their mental health is more important than his math facts. THAT is the perspective of a wise woman, in my opinion.
To all of the mothers who are striving for pre-Covid19 results during this time, please learn from your elders: KNOCK THAT SHIT OFF!